Do you know about this competition?
I lifted this from the following in Huffington Post:
Bulwer-Lytton 2012: Cathy Bryant Wins Worst Opening Sentence Competition
Andrew Losowsky | 15 hours ago
The competition's creator, Professor Scott Rice (aka the Grand Panjandrum) gave this zinger his own special commendation:
"As an ornithologist, George was fascinated by the fact that urine and feces mix in birds’ rectums to form a unified, homogeneous slurry that is expelled through defecation, although eying Greta's face, and sensing the reaction of the congregation, he immediately realized he should have used a different analogy to describe their relationship in his wedding vows." — David Pepper, Hermosa Beach, CA
The competition's website states that "The contest accepts submissions every day of the livelong year." If you can do better - or worse - why not give it a try?
Well! Who knew that I was 'competing' every Sunday? I'm sure I will have some openers to add! I did LOL imagining the above wedding ceremony. It ranks right up there with the groomsmen who faint.